


Jay Skellington, the loneliest Pumpkin King, Jared/Jensen, NC-17

by meus_venator



Category: Supernatural RPF
Genre: Christmas, Crack, Halloween, J2, J2 Crack, M/M, Pumpkin King!Jared, Rating: NC17, Schmoop, j2 crossover, m/m - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-10-26
Updated: 2014-10-26
Packaged: 2018-02-22 18:56:38
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,319
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2518286
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/meus_venator/pseuds/meus_venator
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Jared had never had much luck at dating. Being the Pumpkin King only seemed to make matters worse.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Jay Skellington, the loneliest Pumpkin King, Jared/Jensen, NC-17

**Author's Note:**

  * Translation into 中文 available: [【授权翻译】Jay Skellington, the loneliest Pumpkin King/Jay Skellington,最孤独的南瓜之王](https://archiveofourown.org/works/5115686) by [Milfoil_c](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Milfoil_c/pseuds/Milfoil_c)



**Title:** Jay Skellington, the loneliest Pumpkin King  
 **Author:** **meus_venator**  
 **Beta:** **fufaraw**  
 **Paring:** Jared/Jensen  
 **Genre:** Crack fic, RPS AU  
 **Rating:** NC-17  
 **Disclaimer:** No harm is intended by this story is written only for fun and does not in any way resemble or is meant to represent two underwear models who fight demons on TV. Any similarity is purely co-incidental.  
 **Warnings:** crack fic, M/M sex, and lots of schmoop

 **Summary:** Jared had never had much luck at dating. Being the Pumpkin King only seemed to make things worse.

 **Written for:** [ **j2_crack** ](http://j2-crack.livejournal.com/) **[Kettle of Trouble Part II meme](http://j2-crack.livejournal.com/47732.html)  
  
**

: : :

 **Original Prompt:** Jensen is lonely. As the pumpkin king he meticulously plans each and every Halloween alone and he is weary of it. In the days leading up to this Halloween Jensen is determined that when he goes out that night he is going to treat himself and bring home a mate. He spots Jared at a Halloween party, Jared though, has some tricks of his own.

[](http://simplybeing.livejournal.com/profile)[ **simplybeing**](http://simplybeing.livejournal.com/) ’s reply was: Subject: Re: Pumpkin king!Jensen/Jared

 **NEW PROMPT:** Ooh, I love this! What about the reverse, though-- with Jared as the Pumpkin King? Jensen can be whoever/whatever you want (surprise me!), but I love love love the idea of Pumpkin King Jared.

 

: : :

Jared had tried dating, seriously he had, but things had not gone well for him so far. For a guy who had handled the design, implementation, and rollout of Halloween for the last several hundred flawless years, it was amazing how awkward and bumbly he could be on a date. It’s not that he never had any sex, far from it, Jared was a red blooded Skeleton King from a long line of bone daddies. It was just that somehow, things would always go sideways, and he was beginning to worry that he would never find that perfect someone to spend the rest of his Halloweens with.

Sure, if you didn’t count the singed wings and the chipped tooth he’d inflicted on Nicolas two months ago, it would have been kind of an okay date. How was Jared to know that when Nicolas said he wanted to see Jared’s eyes glow, he didn’t mean by sunrise? Jared had been so lost in the moment that when Nicolas started to squirm beneath him he thought he was simply doing a good job. When Nicolas literally burst into flames and sprang out of bed, chipping his tooth on the bedpost as he flew to the darkest corner of the room, Jared felt more than a bit foolish.

For some reason the cute vampire from the wrong side of town had never called him back for a second date.

And then there was the time he’d bowed to his mother’s repeated requests to hook him up with her second cousin’s son-in-law's nephew, the King of the Centaurs. That hadn’t gone so well either.

Jared might be bone thin but he was still a big boy, and Sthenios hadn’t appreciated having to look up at his date. Then there was the small matter that Sthenios wanted to top, and how did that even work when the centaur weighed a couple of tons and was hung like a horse?

Not wanting to cause some kind of inter-dimensional scene, Jared had tried to appease the man with a hand job because, nuh-uh, that thing wasn’t going anywhere near his ass or his mouth. But apparently, Jared had brushed against some poison sumac somewhere along their walk through the forest and, while Jared's skin didn't react, well.... Jared had had to send several fruit baskets to the hospital during Sthenios' recovery. Jared's mother still hadn’t let him forget that one.

It was probably his date with Gil, the second son of the King of the merpeople that really convinced him dating other eternals was not for him. Again, the date started out fine. In deference to Gil’s, um, gills, they had decided to meet in Atlantis. Gil had been the best kisser; maybe on account of the fact that he didn’t need to breathe, but then neither did Jared; whatever it was the man had the softest lips Jared had had the opportunity to kiss in a long time. The merman was also gifted with the sweetest voice Jared had heard in a millennium and Gil had generously serenaded Jared as they strolled through the King's underwater garden.

It was once they got down to business and Gil’s tail fin started to flap as he grew steadily more aroused that the trouble started. The small weights that Jared had attached to his limbs to keep him submerged for their date had gradually gotten knocked off as Gil was caught in the throes of passion. Just as Gil was ready to come, he gave a powerful surge of his tail, churning the waters, and Jared literally floated off the merman’s dick and up, up and away. Even from a distance through the dappled water, Jared could see he was leaving the merman with the biggest case of blue balls Jared ever seen.

Jared had been so embarrassed he’d had to take fish off the menu for the next six months to avoid any flashbacks. When his mom phoned to try and hook him up with the Thanksgiving turkey guy, Jared politely refused. When she called again to try and introduce him to Santa Claus’ nephew, who was taking over this year after Chris Claus retired, Jared had hung up on her. He was done with blind dates.

So that was how he wound up on a Friday night three days before Halloween, slumped dejectedly over the bar of his local watering hole, listening to his best friend and sometimes bodyguard, Chad, bitch about the latest girlfriend, a demon who, according to Chad, couldn’t get enough of him and was wearing his poor dick out with her scaly hide. Considering Chad was a gargoyle with a pretty tough hide of his own in his natural form, that was saying a lot.

Jared snorted, tuning in and out of the conversation. Chad only needed the occasional grunt of agreement or nod to keep him going. The only thing Jared seemed to be able to focus on was the fact that yet another Halloween was rolling up on the calendar, and Jared was still desperately single.

“It’s not like I’m looking for perfection,” Jared grumped, breaking in over Chad’s moaning when there was a slight pause in his story. Jared looked morosely out the wavery glass windows of the bar. He ran a bony finger along the glass and heard an unfortunate creak before the glass cracked. He winced and snatched his hand away from the glass, but it was too late.

Mark the Ogre, who ran the Monkey’s Paw, slammed two new tankards of blood ale down on the table, grimaced and rolled his eyes, having witnessed the whole thing. “That’s going on your tab Jared! Damn it, watch the bones, man. That’s the fourth window you’ve cracked with those spikey digits of yours.”

Jared's gaze fell to his shoes, and his shaggy hair hid his expression.

“Are you still pissing and moaning about being single?” Mark, a hopeless romantic and habitual matchmaker for all his friends, pulled up a chair beside them and warmed to the subject. “You know for a man your age, with such abilities, you should be a prime catch. But you’ll not catch anything here, mate. Look around.” Mark gestured around the bar.

Jared glanced around and saw the usual suspects, Matt, Richard and Rob, the three vampires were sucking back blood daiquiris in the corner, while JDM, the wolfman, talked shop with the snakeman Pelligrino. Kim was playing darts in the corner with Jim, making goo-goo with her stalked eyes at her long time husband, but Jim was too busy winning to notice. Misha, the bright eyed golem, was sitting next to Tiny the zombie, while Kripke, their inventor in residence regaled them with tales of his latest invention. His Igoresque creature, Carver, hunched at his side, taking notes for what Jared could only assume were Kripke’s much talked about memoirs.

Gazing about at the crew of regulars, loyal subjects all, but all with mates of their own, he could see what Mark was getting at. His chances of meeting his one true love here at The Monkey’s Paw were scarce to none. He shook his head and looked over to where Mark was still talking.

“…I mean, seriously, as your loyal subject I can tell you you’re not going to meet the man of your dreams amongst this lot. You need to get out in the world, Jared, spread your wings. A King of your stature should have been off the market ages ago.”

“I just don’t seem to do too well with other eternals, and I’ve had my last blind date,” Jared shuddered, staring self-consciously at his hands, folded neatly in his lap.

Chad, who had been picking at something stuck in his teeth during the whole conversation, suddenly piped up. “You know the dude’s right Jay, not only because there’s no one here that’s gay to date, but there’s no one even your speed, here. Just because you haven’t hit a home run yet doesn’t mean you should quit. Tomorrow night we should hit a human bar. You can get your gay on, and I’ll find me some girls, we’ll have a great time.”

At Jared’s dubious expression, Chad reiterated, “You’ll find someone, I’m sure.”

“Now that’s thinking.” Mark slapped the table with glee. “Humans –they’re much easier to handle than immortals, and as long as you don’t show them your bones on the first date, it should be a cakewalk.”

“But I don’t know any human bars.” Jared tried to keep the whine out of his voice. It was one thing as the ruler of Halloween land, he knew every nook and cranny of this domain, but outside Tricks and Treating, he didn’t know much about the human world, or where their bars were located.

“S’okay Jay, I got your back. I know a few places. What? I’ve dated the odd human or ten. And they’ll probably be having costume parties tomorrow night, being so close to Halloween, and all. You’ll have to wear a costume, though.”

Affronted, Jared looked down at himself, how could the King of Halloween land’s attire not be appropriate? He was in his usual black pinstriped suit, white shirt, and bowtie. “What’s wrong with what I’m wearing?”

“Well it’s a bit formal, don’t you think? It’s not a funeral we’re going to. But don’t worry, I have something you can wear that’ll be perfect, trust me. Let’s meet at eight and I’ll get you fixed up.”

Jared nodded reluctantly, pushing his hair back behind his ears. Humans? How badly could this go? In spite of his fears, a warm, glow of hope blossomed in his chest.

: : :

“I am not wearing that.” Jared crossed his arms and stared at the costume mutinously. “I wouldn’t be seen dead in that.”

“Jay man, seriously, it’s the only thing I have big enough to fit you. And you’ll look perfect in it.”

“I’ll look ridiculous.”

“Who’s going to see you except a few humans, who will probably be drunk off their asses? Chill, dude, and go put it on. We have to get going, the PantyJam opens in an hour.”

Shuddering with disgust, the offending costume held between pinched fingers, Jared went to change while Chad shifted into his human skin.

: : :

“I hate this costume.”

“You look great in it, besides your long hair goes perfect with the outfit, and look at all the guys giving you looks.”

Jared stared murderously at his friend. “That’s because they think I’m a girl in this!”

“Trust me, Jay, at six foot five, they are not mistaking you for a girl.”

“Why do you get the cool Superman costume, then? Why not just come as a Gargoyle instead of using your human form at all?”

Chad preened and raised his arms, pumping his arms and then giving each of his polypropylene muscles a kiss, “It’s so totally obvious that you’re gay, you know nothing about women, man! The Chad must look good for his followers. Besides, it’s more than a costume, I’m a hero in this.” Chad gestured vaguely at himself. “It is true, I could have come in my natural form, you can’t just stop all this. You’re just mad because you got your panties in a bunch.”

“What did I tell you about how douchey you sound when you talk about yourself in the third person?” Jared tried to pluck discreetly at the skin tight star spangled blue shorts that had managed to work themselves into his butt crease.

“Dude, ew?” Chad slapped Jared’s hand away. “Wonder Woman does not pick her ass.”

Frustrated and uncomfortable, Jared set his empty glass on a nearby table and muttered, “I’m going to the bar for another drink. You want anything?”

“Rum and coke would be great, man.” Chad turned to a woman dressed up as a unicorn and, surveying her sparkling horn, said, “So, you know how to use that thing?”

Jared rubbed his head, careful not to displace his gold tiara in the process. So far, his impression of humans wasn’t much better than what he thought of immortals. Jared shouldered his way toward the bar through the throng of people. The music was thumping, and the surprisingly upscale club Chad had brought them to was packed with the beautiful people of the city. In spite of himself, Jared was impressed.

Wanting a little time away from his friend, Jared decided to lean against the bar for a while, sipping his drink. Chad was already surrounded by four women, the original unicorn having been joined by a fairy and two nurses. And the man already had a new drink in his hand, so Jared wouldn’t be missed anytime soon.

Jared was starting to suspect that Chad had bought some kind of a love charm from Alaina the Sorceress. The man seemed to be attracting women like flies and there was no way humans could be that stupid. Sighing, Jared looked absently down at his drink and noticed for the first time that at the angle he was leaning, his eagle clad breast plate was thrust out far too suggestively. Flustered, he quickly stood straighter.

“That’s quite the costume you have on.” A deep, whisky rough voice chuckled near Jared’s ear.

Jared jerked upright, spilling his rum and coke all over the bar as he tottered on his red boots' unfamiliar heels, and started to list precariously.

“S’alright, I gottcha, darlin’.” A firm hand wrapped instantly around his waist helping to right him, but too late to prevent Jared's left heel from coming down hard on one of his saviors’ feet.

‘And so it begins’, Jared closed his eyes in humiliation, biting at his lip as he heard the soft grunt of pain the man made. Totally mortified, he tried to avoid eye contact as he grabbed several napkins to mop up the spreading mess on the bar.

“I am so sorry,” he huffed out, finally building the courage to look his savior in the face. He found himself looking into a pair of sparkling emerald eyes through the mask the man was wearing.

“No problem. I’m here to protect the city and all its citizens.”

Jared’s mouth twitched, a grin creeping onto his face as he surveyed the man. Not quite Jared’s height (but then not many people were), he was easily six foot plus. His costume hugged a muscular form which Jared suspected was more the natural variety than Chad’s polypropylene padding.

“Seriously?” Jared knew his dimples were on full display, but the man was too adorable.

“Well, I _am_ Batman!” his savior smirked, striking the classic hero pose.

Jared couldn’t help the barking laugh that escaped, but it was okay. Batman laughed along with him.

“Can I buy you a fresh drink, and maybe join you? A beautiful lady such as yourself shouldn’t be left alone in a bar.”

“Oh I’m not alone, I have The Chad.” Jared said wryly.

“Sounds like more of an affliction than a good thing. Let me handle this.” The stranger winked and waved at the bartender to order them each fresh drinks.

“Yeah, you’re not wrong. Sometimes he is all that.” Jared nodded toward Chad, who was now surrounded by no less than six women. Jared was going to have a serious talk with Alaina when he got back to Halloween Town. But that was for later. Here and now, Jared stuck out his hand.

“I’m Jared, by the way, and thanks for saving me.”

“Just Jared?”

Jared tilted his head and stared at the man coyly.

The man put up his hands in a classic ‘I surrender’ pose, “S’alright, I can work with that. I’m Jensen.”

Jared grinned, shaking hands with the man. He couldn’t help but notice the spark of arousal that ran through him at Jensen’s touch.

“Care to join me over in the lounge, so we can sit and talk somewhere more comfortable?” At Jared’s nod, Jensen picked up their new drinks and, crooking an arm, offered his support. Jared clutched at his arm gratefully. Tottering along beside Jensen, Jared vowed this was the last time he was ever taking Chad up on any costume suggestions.

This area of the bar was quieter, and definitely cooler. It was a pleasant reprieve to be off the four inch heels. Jared noticed a distinct scent of gummy bears or some other sugary sweet scent in the air of the lounge, like someone had dropped their purple nurple or something on the carpet at some point during the evening. It wasn't rank or disgusting, far from it. It made Jared’s mouth water and he licked his lips, remembering now that he'd been too nervous to have supper.

His sugary thoughts were soon forgotten when Jensen pulled back his caped crusader cowl. Jared’s mouth literally hung open, until he remembered to shut it. Fortunately Jensen was busy running his hand through his short spiky hair, and rubbing his forehead where the mask had left a slight impression in his skin.

Jensen was beautiful. There were no other words to describe him. The man’s stunning bottle green eyes were set off by chiseled cheek and jaw bones, saved from perfection by a slightly crooked nose. That face would be at home on the cover of any gentleman's fashion magazine. But Jared’s attention was riveted on the dusting of freckles over the bridge of his savior's nose, and Jensen’s plush, plump lips. Jared’s cock swelled in his spangled shorts and he crossed his legs self-consciously. It took him a moment to realize Jensen wasn’t simply licking his beautiful lips but that the man was speaking, and Jared had to force himself to concentrate on what he was saying.

“Damn, I love this costume, but the suit gets so hot. You know?” Jensen chuckled and Jared watched as a smooth easy smile filled Jensen’s face as he looked over at Jared.

“So what brings you here tonight, you and Wonder Woman?”

Jared smiled and was soon caught up in conversation. Jensen was so easy to talk to, it was as if they had known each other for years, and over several drinks they ended up talking for well over an hour in the secluded corner of the bar, before Chad finally appeared.

“Dude, been looking for you everywhere!”

Jared looked up guiltily, having completely forgotten about his friend, who now had seven women in tow. He certainly hadn’t been suffering in Jared’s absence.

“Look, I tried to bring you a prezzie, but none of the guys were really doing it for me. Good thing I guess, it seems you found your own. That golden lasso I made you carry must have come in handy.”

Jared glanced guiltily back at Jensen who appeared to be unfazed by Chad’s bizarre comments.

“You ready to jet, or you got other plans?” Chad waggled his eyebrows suggestively. “I don’t want to be stepping on your toes if you’re getting your gay on, or anything, I know you don’t get out much, and this one looks pretty cute, if I do say so myself.”

Jared might have groaned out loud at this point.

“Actually, I know it’s rather sudden, but I was going to ask you if you wanted to grab a bite to eat, together.” Jensen announced, pointedly ignoring Chad’s not so subtle remarks. “I don’t know about you, but I’m starving. What do you say?” Jensen grasped Jared’s hand and started to rub gentle circles on the palm of his hand.

Pleasure zinged up and down Jared’s spine, and when Jensen shifted uncomfortably, Jared realized he had zoned out staring at the man, and had yet to answer.

As if on cue, Jared’s stomach rumbled loudly, breaking the spell he seemed to have fallen under. “Sounds awesome,” Jared breathed, in a rush. He looked at Chad, silently pleading for Chad not to embarrass him further. “I’ll talk with you tomorrow, then?”

Chad rolled his eyes and shook his head. “Okay dude, have fun. Don’t do anything I wouldn’t do. Oh wait, well, I wouldn’t do any of the gay stuff, so that doesn’t work. Just… be safe, okay?”

Jared barked out a nervous laugh and shook his head. “Chad, you are such a dick.”

“Right back atcha, man. Later. Hey, remember we got that thing tomorrow night, so we need an early start.” Chad hinted warningly and, at Jared’s nod, wrapped his arms around his ladies and disappeared into the crowd, leaving Jared alone with Jensen.

“I’m sorry about Chad. I’ve known him since grade school, but he really is an ass.” Jared rushed to apologize.

“Hey, I understand. I have friends like that, too.” Jensen gave him a lopsided grin before growing suddenly serious and bowing his head, green eyes hidden behind long, thick eyelashes as he chewed on his bottom lip. Finally nodding to himself, he raised his head and stared at Jared earnestly. “I know this might seem sudden, but I’m usually so much more awkward with people when I first meet them. But with you, it seems so effortless. Instead of wandering the streets, why don’t we grab a bite to eat in my hotel room? I can order room service and we can have a nightcap. I’m staying just across the street.”

: : :

Jensen pushed Jared up against the wall of the exclusive hotel’s elevator, his lips already capturing Jared’s, even before the doors slid closed. Lost in the sensation of the sweet scent and Jensen's tongue laving over his, Jared didn’t even notice when the elevator bell ‘binged’ and the doors slid open. Jensen easily maneuvered them both into the hall, his sinfully plush lips never stopping the kisses the whole time. He only broke contact to unlock the suite’s door.

“Wow,” Jared huffed, catching his breath. Blinking, he staggered into the luxurious suite, unsure if he was still speaking about Jensen’s breathtakingly sweet kiss or the view of the city that filled one whole wall of the hotel room.

Jensen recaptured his waist and pulled him down onto the sofa. “Think it’s about time we got you out of those boots, don’t you?” Jensen murmured as he continued to nibble along Jared’s neck.

Jared smiled, dimples on full display. “I thought you were going to feed me first?” He said playfully.

Jensen reluctantly pulled back, “Whichever hunger you’d like sated first. You just let me know.” He smiled seductively.

“Oh, I think you were doing just fine.”

Jensen hummed in approval as he unhooked his utility belt, laying it aside and kneeling to ease himself between Jared’s spread legs. Jensen’s hand ran appreciatively along Jared’s red suede boot. “These boots have been lucky for me. I think we'll leave these on for a while.” With a knowing smirk he squeezed Jared's knee and reached up to palm his fattening cock, pressed tight to his body in the spangled shorts.

“Looks like little Jay wants to come out to play,” Jensen murmured. His hands slid to Jared’s golden waistband and tugged the tight shorts and blue nylons down and off of Jared’s legs. Jared’s cock sprang to instant attention, once free of the tight costume, and bobbed slick and weeping against his belly. Jared shivered, his skin burning in the sudden chill of the room.

Ignoring Jared’s cock, Jensen rose to sit beside Jared and found the hidden catches at the back of his breastplate, unhooking them until he could ease Jared’s top off. Grabbing up Jared’s golden lasso he set that down beside them on the sofa and waggled his eyebrows suggestively, “We might need that later on.”

A jolt of lust ripped through Jared at the thought of being tied up by the man. He exhaled a ragged breath, coming back to himself as Jensen cradled his face. Jensen carefully removed Jared’s tiara and flung it on the growing stack of Jared’s clothing, and ran his fingers through Jared’s hair. “So beautiful,” he whispered, before sinking down again between Jared’s spread knees.

Dazed, Jared watched as Jensen bent down and blew softly over Jared’s cock, and jerked in response to the chill sensation against his overheated flesh. Jensen was only getting started. He pressed butterfly kisses and kitten licks down the length of Jared’s shaft. He soon had Jared flinging himself back against the sofa with a moan as Jensen’s warm tongue laved a long strip from the base of his balls, following the thick vein up to the head of Jared’s cock, and licking under the sensitive hood.

Jared's fingers sank into the cushions, and he let out another uncontrolled moan as Jensen tongued his slit, sucking in just the crown of his cock between those plush lips. Jared had to make a conscious effort not to buck up into Jensen’s face as he tongued the rim of Jared’s mushroom head.

With a wet plop, Jensen pulled off Jared’s cock and chuckled, the warm huff of his breath against Jared’s sensitive flesh making him shiver. “Just getting started darlin’, hold on now.”

Jensen gave him a lopsided grin before easing the plump purpling head of Jared’s cock between those perfect lips again. Jared groaned as Jensen slowly swallowed him down, and then began to bob up and down on his cock. Jared flung back his head and shivered at the sensations running through him. He groaned when Jensen started to play with his balls, rolling them loosely in his hand. The scent of liquorice filled the room, along with Jared’s harsh breathing, and it only took a few more strokes before Jared squeaked, “Jensen, I’m gonna….” Close to coming, he tried to push Jensen away.

It was when Jensen’s green eyes peeked up at him through those long, thick lashes, his mouth stuffed with Jared’s cock, that he lost all control. With a sharp cry, he spilled deep down Jensen’s throat.

When Jared came back to himself, Jensen had him half pulled into his lap, combing his fingers again through the silky strands of Jared’s hair.

“You okay?” Jensen whispered as he laid a gentle kiss on Jared’s brow.

“Yeah, why wouldn’t I be? I just blew my brains out my cock.” Jared chuckled. He could feel the hard press of Jensen’s cock through the Batman costume against his ass. “You want a little help with that?” Jared offered, trying to slide to his knees.

But Jensen held him in place. “No, when I come I want it to be inside you. I want to fuck you so hard you’ll be walking funny for the next week. And I want you to come so hard from my dick being in you that you pass out.” Jensen gave Jared a leering grin, “You think you can hold off on the food until we do that? I don’t want to be accused of starving you.”

Jared swallowed, eyes wide, his exhausted cock twitching in anticipation. “Oh, I’ll last.”

They stumbled into the bedroom, bits and pieces of Jensen’s Batman costume, and Jared's lucky boots, left in a trail on the floor behind them. As they reached the bed, Jared twisted round at the last minute and pushed Jensen onto the bed on his back. He noticed for the first time Jensen’s sexy bowed legs as he crawled like a big predatory cat up Jensen’s body, licking a line up his thigh, making a beeline for the man’s beautiful cock, rising hard from a nest of ginger curls.

Holding Jensen’s cock in his hand, Jared licked a line from his taint all the way up to the head of Jensen’s cock. A minty flavor, like candy cane, burst on his tongue, and he swallowed Jensen down.

He looked up at his lover, his hand snaking up Jensen’s broad chest to tweak his copper colored nipples as he continued to suckle on his cock. Jensen fattened even more in his mouth and Jared purred, watching as Jensen’s green eyes turned black with arousal.

“Jay, please, I’m so close. I want to come inside you, man,” Jensen whispered and, reluctantly, Jared let Jensen’s cock slip from his lips. A bottle of lube appeared almost magically in Jared’s hand and he tossed sweaty hair out of his eyes before pumping some onto his fingers.

“Wanna watch you open yourself up Jay, wanna watch you come on my cock,” Jensen breathed, and in spite of the heat shedding off him in waves, Jared shivered in the sudden chill. A refreshingly cool wind blew through the room and what felt like snowflakes landed on Jared’s shoulders as he reached back to open himself up.

Jensen raised himself onto his elbows, his tongue swiping across his spit slick lips as he watched Jared’s finger dip inside his tight hole. Jared grunted in effort, it had been so long since he had done this. He wriggled his lube slick digit around until he could take more. Jensen leaned up and kissed him, hot and sloppy, licking into his mouth with a moan as he distracted Jared from the burn, and he was able to add another finger. Jared worked himself open enough to take three fingers. He glanced down at the size of Jensen’s cock and guessed he might need four, but he couldn’t wait any longer. Jared's gaze was captured by Jensen's own as Jared rose to his knees, and holding Jensen's blood filled cock steady with one hand, he guided himself down. The blunt head nudged at his hole, and Jared forced himself to relax.

Lacing the fingers of his hand and one of Jensen's tightly together, Jared let himself sink slowly down onto Jensen’s length. His eyes shuttered closed, his breathing came ragged at the burn as he bit back the hurt whimpery sounds that wanted to slip past his lips, in spite of the prep. It had been a while, and Jared took his time, sinking inch by inch until he was fully seated on Jensen’s cock. His eyelids fluttered open, and Jensen took his other hand, staring up at Jared like he was something precious. Jared shivered, it had been a long time since anyone had looked at him like that. The burn slowly eased and became something more, something that needed to be fed.

“Ride me,” Jensen breathed, his voice sounding wrecked, and Jared tossed his head and obliged, rising nearly all the way off Jensen’s dick before letting himself slide back down, sparks of pleasure shooting up his spine as Jensen’s cock rubbed against his prostate.

“You could have warned me.” Jared tried to glare accusingly at Jensen, but his ire turned into a moan of arousal as he jousted up and down on Jensen’s cock.

“You might not have fucked me.” Jensen laughed as Jared rocked up and down on him in a growing frenzy. “Besides I’m not the only one here hung like a moose.” Jensen’s pink tongue darted out to lick his lips as he eyed Jared’s cock slapping wetly against he belly.

“Jen, I’m so close.”

“So am I.” Jensen moaned as he released one of Jensen’s hands and started to strip Jared’s weeping cock.

Jared let out a sharp cry as he came all over Jensen’s hand, shooting white streaks across his belly and chest, convulsing around Jensen’s member as he came.

A few more quick thrusts by Jensen as he rocked up into Jared, and Jensen was coming too, painting Jared’s insides with his come.

The two collapsed together in a heap, Jensen cradling Jared against him as his cock slipped from Jared's wet and leaking hole.

“When we wake up,” Jared mumbled sleepily, “You owe me breakfast.”

“You got yourself a deal, darlin’” Jensen growled in his ear as he flung the covers over both of them. Jared dreamed of snow falling all around them as he lay nestled in Jensen’s arms.

: : :

Jared woke alone the next morning. He felt the familiar thrum of anticipation as the magic of Halloween night began to build in his bones. This was the night that he would make sure all the Tricks and Treats were spread throughout the land to all the good girls and boys.

He stretched luxuriantly. He always loved these few hours before it all started, what they planned for all year. He glanced guiltily over at the empty side of the bed and wondered, what he should do about Jensen. He had to leave, but he didn’t want to give up on whatever this was between them. He had to talk to Jensen.

As if on cue, Jensen poked his head in the bedroom door and strolled over, bare chested, sleep pants sitting low on his lean hips highlighted the adorably bowed legs. He leaned down and gave Jared a sweet toffee flavored kiss and set a mug of coffee on the nightstand for him.

“Mmm, ” Jared moaned licking his lips. “You always taste so sweet.”

Jensen laughed, “Occupational hazard,” he said obliquely as he rose. “Hey, I just ordered room service, you have just enough time to shower before it gets here. I left you a pair of track pants and a t-shirt if you want to change into them.”

Nodding, Jared slipped from the covers, to sit by the side of the bed, his cock half hard between his legs.

“Sorry man, no time to take care of that, and shower, and eat. Maybe after breakfast.” With a twinkle in his eye, Jensen sauntered from the room.

Jared’s brain started to come back online in the shower, and by the time he strode into the main room of Jensen’s suite he was starting to panic. He needed to leave now! There were a million details he must attend to, let alone the fact that, as protective as Chad was, he might show up at Jensen’s hotel room any minute now to drag Jared back to Halloween land.

It was the poorest timing in the world. Sex with this human certainly seemed to have agreed with him. In fact this whole human seemed to agree with him, even more. Jared had to get his address so they could keep in touch. Maybe after Halloween was over, they could hook up again, get to know each other better. ‘Have more mind blowing sex’, the evil part of Jared’s brain helpfully supplied.

Jensen was sitting at the end of a long table that practically groaned with food. As Jared approached, Jensen folded the newspaper he was reading. “Hey, I hope there’s something here you like. I ordered a bit of everything.”

Jay stared at the banquet that literally overhung the table in places. His teeth dug into his bottom lip and he grimaced. “Hey, Jensen, I really don’t want to be a fuck and run kind of guy, but I have this thing today, that I kind of totally forgot, and I have to leave.”

The bright smile slowly disappeared from Jensen’s face and he stared at Jared thoughtfully.

“I’m sorry, I just thought...” Jensen took an unconscious step back.

“That we had something," Jared nodded. “And we do," he added quickly, trying to reassure Jensen. “Ummm, we will, I hope, I promise. I just really have to go, right now. But I want to see you again, I do. Seriously, because you’re beautiful and you’re awesome.”

Jensen tilted his head quizzically at Jared’s spastic ramblings.

“I just have to go.” Jared strode purposefully toward Jensen and, grabbing that gorgeous face gently between his hands, he let his tongue sweep over Jensen’s lips in a teasing invitation. Gasping, Jensen’s eyes that had widened at Jared’s approach, now fluttered closed and Jared took the invitation to sweep inside, licking and tasting Jensen, gorging himself on Jensen’s flavor to make it last until he could see him again.

Jared could sense the rustle of Chad’s wings as the man landed somewhere on a higher floor, here to carry Jared home. He did not want his human confronted by a ten ton stone gargoyle, who was probably still nursing a hangover.

Staring at Jensen, willing him to understand, he rushed to explain, “I have to go, but I need to see you again. Would you, would you happen to know your normal co-ordinates in longitude and latitude?”

Jensen smiled quizzically at him, but with a raised brow grabbed a piece of hotel stationery and scribbled something down. He folded it carefully into a square and pressed it into Jared’s palm.

“Jay, you’re something else. I’m leaving the hotel today myself, and I’ll be there at that location up until Christmas. After that, all bets are off.”

Nodding, tears, sparking unaccountably in his eyes, Jared leaned down for one more peppermint flavored kiss before rushing out of the room.

“I’ll find you,” he cried as the door closed behind him and Jared raced up the fire escape steps to where Chad waited impatiently.

: : :

Halloween went off without a single hitch, but as the town applauded his latest efforts, the celebration tasted like ashes in his mouth. All Jared wanted was to see Jensen. Now. He wanted to kiss his human silly, and confess who he was. And even if begging was involved, he wanted to see if they could make whatever this was between them work.

Slinking away from the festivities as soon as he could, Jared grabbed Chad, and thrusting the folded piece of paper into his hand, he ordered the Gargoyle to take him to Jensen’s location.

Chad unfolded the directions carefully and his stone eyebrows rose in surprise. “You want me to take you here?” Chad scratched his ear. “Seriously dude?”

“Yes, and I want to be there yesterday. I have some explaining to do.”

Although, when Chad touched down at the North Pole, Jared thought he had seriously lost his marbles. “What the hell man?” Jared demanded as Chad set him down, knee deep in snow.

“This is where you wanted to go. It’s right here, the lat and long and then, Number 1, North Pole. It’s what your human wrote down.” Chad shrugged.

Jared gazed about, utterly flummoxed. Why would his human be at the North Pole? Well whatever the reason, he needed to speak to him. Jared stalked through the snow, checking the numbers on the brightly decorated, glistening white cottages that formed the village at the North Pole. Finally he reached the center of town, and a huge glistening home that towered above all the others. He rang the doorbell and waited anxiously for someone to appear. When the door opened, it wasn’t his human, it was a very short, very definitely elfin figure clad in a green tunic and hose, with bells on his toes.

“May I help you, sir?” The elf looked up, and up, and up, until he finally reached Jared’s face.

Jared twisted the note between his fingers and, tossing caution to the wind, asked, “Is Jensen in?”

The elf’s expression didn’t change, he simply nodded and gestured for Jared to come inside. “He’s in his study sir, follow me.”

The inside of the big house was surprisingly tasteful, none of the candy cane colour and bright baubles that festooned the exterior of all the houses. Inside, it was clean white walls with hand hewn wood beams and comfortable furnishings.

The elf stopped in front of a pair of doors, opened them and ushered Jared inside. “He has been expecting you,” the elf gave Jared a warm, approving smile.

A little confused, Jared peered into the room. “Hello?”

There was a man standing with his back to Jared. His broad shoulders, outlined by the glow of the fire, were covered by a red, trim fitting Henley, and Jared would have recognized those bowlegs anywhere. “Jensen?”

Jensen turned, his expression adorably distracted as he pulled his attention away from the long, long list he was purusing. A small pair of round, gold rimmed spectacles perched precariously on the end of his nose as he blinked owlishly. Jensen's green eyes widened as he refocused on Jared. A broad, fond smile filled his face and he started to laugh, a big booming laugh that filled the room with merriment and seemed eeriliy familiar to Jared.

“Jared, you came! And so soon.”

Jared rushed over and sank into Jensen’s embrace, both of them kissing and biting hungrily at each other as if they hadn’t seen each other in years, let alone a matter of hours. Finally, breathless, they broke apart.

“Jensen, why are you here at the North Pole? Is someone keeping you here against your will? You can tell me. I-I have connections.” Jared held Jensen’s hand tightly, no one would keep his human against his will.

A red blush appeared on Jensen’s cheeks and he looked away sheepishly. “Jared, Jay, I haven’t been entirely honest with you.”

Jared’s heart clenched painfully, and he whispered, “And I haven’t with you either, but I care for you Jensen, so much.”

“And I care for you too. That’s why when your mother couldn’t arrange for us to meet, I took it upon myself to meet you.” Jensen rubbed his hand guiltily along his jaw.

“My mother? What does she have to do with anything?”

“She tried to set us up on a blind date a few months back. She showed me your picture and, I have to say, I never believed in love at first sight, but I think I fell in love with you right then. That’s why I was devastated when you wouldn’t meet me.”

Jared stepped back, his brow furrowed. “I don’t. I mean. I’ve never turned down a date with a human. I just told my mother enough was enough when she tried to hook me up with Chris Claus’s nephew….”

Light slowly dawned in Jared’s eyes as he looked at Jensen, the red Henley, the black belt and tight fitting black jeans.

“But Santa’s fat!” Jared blurted out.

Jensen chuckled and stepped closer to Jared, pulling him into his arms. “Occupational hazard around this much candy. I’ll need a strong man to make sure that, after a couple hundred years in charge, I don’t get as round as Chris. Are you that man, Jared?”

Jared leaned down, his lips mere inches from Jensen’s and the scent of apples and cinnamon and home filled his nose. “I could sure learn to be.”

“Good enough for me. Come ’ere, darlin’,” Jensen’s green eyes twinkled merrily as snow began to sparkle in the air around them, and Jensen pulled him eagerly into a kiss.

END

  
^^Comments are always Booo-liciously good, no matter when you read the story. Especially since otherwise I can't tell if anyone is even reading or liking this.

**Works inspired by this one:**

  * [[Podfic] Jay Skellington, the Loneliest Pumpkin King | written by meus_venator](https://archiveofourown.org/works/4214082) by [Tipsy_Kitty](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Tipsy_Kitty/pseuds/Tipsy_Kitty)




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